"Why they ever cut it is beyond me...."

Below is the story of Brewster the Rooster...would you want to deal with Brewster the Uncut Behemoth Bovine? 😮

There once was a farmer who had a few chickens. For financial reasons, the farmer wanted to increase the egg production from his chickens and go into business. And so, the farmer set out to buy a rooster. He drove across the county to another farm that had many chickens and roosters.

The first farmer asks, "I'd like to buy a rooster."

The second farmer says, "No problem. What's he for?"

The first farmer says, "I want a rooster so that my chickens can have more chickens and lay more eggs."

The second farmer points to a rooster, "Okay. Take Brewster over there... he'll do all your chickens for you." The rooster he pointed out was lying on his back and breathing heavily.

The first farmer exclaims, "What? You've got to be kidding. That rooster is practically dead! He's breathing like there's no tomorrow."

The second farmer says, "Don't worry, he'll do fine. I guarantee he'll do all your chickens and you'll end up with more eggs than you could ever imagine."

Well, the first farmer thinks about it, and finally agrees, "Okay. A guarantee is a guarantee. Sold." He scoops up Brewster and lays him in the back of his truck.

As soon as the farmer pulls into his yard, Brewster leaps out of the truck and grabs a chicken. After he's done with one, he does another, and another...

The farmer says, "Take it easy Brewster! You're going to hurt yourself!"

Brewster just waves, grabs another chicken, and nails that one too. He proceeds to do all the chickens just as the other farmer had promised. When he finishes the chickens, he runs after the dog, and does him too.

The farmer is starting to get a little worried.

Brewster then does the cat, the horse, and all the other farm animals too. He then starts chasing after the farmer's wife!

Some time passes and the farmer can't find Brewster anywhere. He looks everywhere and eventually finds the poor rooster on his back, motionless, with a flock of vultures circling overhead.

The farmer cries out to himself, "Oh no! I told him to be careful! Now look what's happened."

Brewster opens one eye and whispers, "Shhh! They're about to land."