A friend sent this to me this week.
It’s been around awhile, but it is truer now than ever.
Enjoy.

New Age Pizza

“Hello! Gordon's Pizza?”

“No sir, it's Google's Pizza”

“Sorry, I must have a wrong number”

“No sir, Google bought the pizza shop”

“OK. Here’s my order...”

“No problem sir, you want the usual?”

“The usual? How would you know? ...you’re under new management..”

“According to our caller ID, on the last 12 occasions you ordered pizza with cheese, Sausage, thick crust..”

“Right…”

“…May I suggest this time you have ricotta, aragula and dried tomato?”

“No, I hate vegetables”

“But what about your high cholesterol?”

“My high cholesterol? How would you know?”

“Through the Subscribers Guide. We have the results of your blood tests for the last 7 years”

“I don’t care, I already take medicine. Give me my usual”

“But you haven’t been taking your medicine. You last purchased a box of 30 and that was 4 months ago at Drugsale Network”

“I bought more from another drugstore”

“It's not showing on your credit card..”

“I paid in cash”

“But you didn’t withdraw enough cash according to your bank statement”

“I have another source of cash”

“It’s not showing on your last Tax Return, unless you got it from an undeclared income source…”

“Go to HELL!
No more Google, Facebook, twitter, WhatsApp or bloody pizza!
I'm going to a deserted island with no Internet, no cell phones,
and no one to spy on me!”

“I understand sir, but you will need to renew your passport,
your old one expired 5 weeks ago."